…

Geniale Serie, schade dass die fünfte Staffel gerade zum Ende gekommen ist. Zur Überbrückung bis zur sechsten Staffel ein paar Zitate die ich einfach nur genial finde.

Jesus waited three days to come back to life. It was perfect! If he had only waited one day, a lot of people wouldn’t have even heard he died. They’d be all, „Hey Jesus, what up?“ and Jesus would probably be like, „What up? I died yesterday!“ and they’d be all, „Uh, you look pretty alive to me, dude…“ and then Jesus would have to explain how he was resurrected, and how it was a miracle, and the dude’d be like „Uhh okay, whatever you say, bro…“ And he’s not gonna come back on a Saturday. Everybody’s busy, doing chores, workin‘ the loom, trimmin‘ the beard, NO. He waited the perfect number of days, three.

Plus it’s Sunday, so everyone’s in church already, and they’re all in there like „Oh no, Jesus is dead“, and then BAM! He bursts in the back door, runnin‘ up the aisle, everyone’s totally psyched, and FYI, that’s when he invented the high five. That’s why we wait three days to call a woman, because that’s how long Jesus wants us to wait…. True story – Monolog von Barney

***

How do you keep a girl from becoming your girlfriend? – Simple, the rules for girls are the same as the rules for Gremlins. Rule number one: never get them wet. In other words: never let them take a shower at your place. Rule number two: keep them away from sunlight. I mean don’t ever see them during the day. And rule number three: never feed them after midnight, meaning she doesn’t sleep over and you don’t have breakfast with her. EVER. – Barney

***

Barney zu Ted: „You know what is the back of your brain?“
Ted: „Great here comes little Barney speech“
Barney: „Behind a curtain in a dark little room secretly controling your every move…“
Ted+Marschall: „A little Barney“
Barney: „…a little Barney. And you know what he said? ‚Ted, you will bring no date to this wedding. Youuu will hit on drunk bridesmaids with actual size Barney'“

***

Okay yes, it‘s a mistake! I know it‘s a mistake! But there are certain things in life where you know it‘s a mistake but you don‘t really know it‘s a mistake because the only way to really know it‘s a mistake is to make the mistake and look back and say: „Yeah, that was a mistake!“ So really the bigger mistake would be to not make the mistake because then you go your whole life not really knowing if something is a mistake or not. – Lilly

***

„Chinese?“
„I don’t like Chinese.“
„Indian?“
„I just said I don’t like Chinese.
„Indian isn’t Chinese.“
„Weird meat, funny music, side of rice. Why are we splitting hairs?“
„Mexican?“
„I just said I don’t like Chinese!“ – Barney

In diesem Sinne viele Grüße,
der Typ von Nebenan
Sebastian